My 7 Rules for Dragging Him Back Into the Store

Gary had already bolted for the food court after five minutes, ready for his usual bench nap.

I marched right after him and used these seven tricks to haul him back inside.

1. Wear the red dress he likes. The satin one that swishes past my knees. His eyes stay on me, not the exit.
2. Mention the new tool aisle. Gary lights up faster than a power drill. Suddenly he has all afternoon.
3. Promise a slow browse. I whisper we'll take our sweet time. His shopping stamina somehow improves.
4. Bring sister along as backup. She corners him by the ties while I block the door with three more shirts.
5. Text Linda for reinforcements. Her church-lady gossip keeps him rooted until I've tried on everything twice.
6. Offer church-lady cookies. Mrs. Wilkins' oatmeal raisin batch works better than any sales pitch.
7. Hide his car keys. He can't nap in the lot without them. Works like a charm every time.

What did you think I meant? Shame on you.

Follow Ruby Hayes on Facebook for more.